First Date Do’s and Donts

First dates are all about first impressions, and remember – you never get a second chance to make a good first impression.  It is normal for someone to feel pressure and nervousness before and during a first date, making even the most experienced dater shy and silent.  One rule of thumb, as skeptical as you may be, is to set expectations low of a first date.  This can ensure that you will not feel too bad after a first date that didn’t go well.  On the other side a good date will become a surprise.  If you don’t expect too much from a first date then there is a higher likelihood that a second date can and will happen.  Here is some first date etiquette.

  1. Make eye contact – Eye contact will send a message to your date that you are actually interested in what they have to say and will make them feel important.
  2. Speak and listen – Make sure that you are listening, as well as speaking.  Having a conversation is more important that just asking random questions to get through the night.
  3. Try to have fun – Don’t put too much unneeded pressure on yourself.  After all it is just a date.  Look at it this way – all you are doing is hanging out with a new person for a few hours.  Smile and laugh at their jokes and stories (where appropriate).  This will make your date feel that you are both having a good time.
  4. Give a confirmation call – A quick confirmation call will help in making you more relaxed.  Any worries that you may have about being stood up can be relieved with this one simple act.  This can also show your date that you are looking forward to meeting.
  5. Don’t be late – Show your date that you respect their time as well as your own.  This is a quality that most everyone will appreciate and maybe even find attractive.  If you are late your date may get the impression that you are someone that cannot be relied upon.
  6. Don’t ask extremely personal questions – Most people don’t want to reveal too much about themselves too early.  After the first date there will be plenty of time for asking more intimate questions.
  7. Don’t pretend be someone you’re not – The real you will come out eventually, especially if you continue to date.  Start off by introducing your date to who you really are flaws and all.
  8. Don’t talk too closely – Personal space is a must.  Your date may become uncomfortable by you getting too close while talking.  Getting in your date’s personal space may cause them to shut down emotionally and you will not learn as much about them as you would like.

 These are some basic first date “Do’s and Dont’s”.  Some helpful suggestions include:

  • Wear your ‘second best’ outfit – Don’t pull out the best, first.  You have no place to go but down.  With your second best outfit, there is still room to grow.
  • Have someone prepped to make an emergency phone call – You never know if the person across cyberspace is really Mr. Tall Dark and Handsome or Mr. Tall Dark and Handsome with a Machete and Rope hidden in his trunk.  If you have psycho eyes staring back at you over a plate of fava beans, make a bee line to the bathroom to tap into your support network.
  • Bring breath spray – This one needs no explanation.
  • Don’t eat any of the following – Indian food, Thai food, Ethiopian food, or Mexican food.  Nothing kills a good time like indigestion.